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Friday, February 22, 2008

Assailed by Agenda

A new calendar sings a siren song to me. The clean lines and empty squares call to me---wooing with promises of efficiency, discipline and triumph. “You too can be organized. A schedule will simplify your life; and you will be happy.” I know the song. I have swayed to the melody many a January and February afternoon. A dulcet voice croons in my head, “Fill your days with activity, you will achieve so much more.” And though I know the tune is just a fairy-tale sung to lure me onto the rocks of disappointment, I fill in that planner, use colored pencils and stickers, categorize and arrange.

It is a work of art. And when it’s finished, I feel a rush of adrenaline, accomplishment and competence. Then after a few days, or maybe even a full week, my color-coded masterpiece is no longer the thing of beauty it once was. It has become a demanding task master, and I revolt, refusing to let it stifle my creativity. So, I crumple the page and scatter colored post-its across my desk top. I write notes about doctor appointments and bills to pay on napkins and the back of a grocery store receipt. I realize that no matter how alluring an organized calendar may seem, I will always thrive on the variety and chaos of a messy, half-structured system, where I may be confused, but at least I’m still the boss.


Bev said...

Great thoughts about what would appear to be simple things, but are actually the stuff of life. Does it serve us, or do we serve it? Good question to ask about many things every day.

Child Life said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Childlife said...

Wahooo! You did it - see, it wasn't that hard, was it? :)

This one made me laugh, TaunaLen... I do the same silly dance! It wasn't but three weeks into the new year this year that my calendar was 'temporarily' misplaced and my life became a profusion of colored post-its once more :D

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